Where do I even begin? The year has been like a dream of a never-ending roller coaster. There were wonderful moments of elation and supreme happiness mixed with scary nightmarish moments out of our control. I’ll share a few thoughts as I look back at this year. We celebrated Marla’s birthday in February with a dinner for two. For some reason our breakfast table is our cozy spot.

I went a little crazy with travel in 2021! Being someone to never pass up an opportunity for celebrations and travel adventures, we seized the day with trips to Dallas, Boston, Lake Tahoe, France, and Northern California. We spent two weeks in Bandol and Antibes with our daughter Lisa and family. It was just wonderful! The only real challenge was navigating COVID protocols and changing entry requirements.

A week after returning from France we left for a trip to Northern California with our daughter Stacy and family. The trip was a continuation of a family tradition called the “nine-year-old” trip though the Girls are still eight. The beaches and tidepools on the Sonoma Coast were a source of wonder. Little did we know but on August 13th we rushed Marla to a hospital in Santa Rosa at 4:30 AM. She was diagnosed with heart failure. After five nights I was able to bring her home.

She went back into the hospital for 8 nights in October and 5 in November. I wouldn’t be exaggerating to say almost every other day in the last three months has been with either doctor visits, nurse check-ups, physical therapy, or lab testing. Thank goodness for Medicare insurance and the team at South Denver Heart Associates…and Marla’s indomitable spirit! She is a warrior! The image above is Marla taking short walks around her room and the nearby hallway at Parker Hospital.

Doctors and nurse practitioners have prescribed a long, often changing, cocktail of drugs to help the heart and to also reduce fluid buildup. In November she had a defibrillator/pacemaker implanted in her chest. What was supposed to be an hour surgery took four hours! We both feel it is helping and she no longer has to wear a life vest 24 hours a day!

In the early days I became a sudden caregiver with no playbook but plenty of “what if’s” in the chaos of the moment. My mind was in full free association mode, drifting from one scenario to the next. Fear, apprehension, and a dark cloud of helplessness came over me. It was time to really grow up and get out of myself if I was to be of any use to Marla! I needed to work on a plan that would help us both be resilient as possible for the road ahead. It was time to reframe the narrative with a new focus and cherish the beautiful present moment and envision a happy future. We live in a world of hopefulness and gratitude.

I know I am a work in progress and have further to evolve as the best partner for Marla. We are truly thankful for kind thoughts, prayers, and positive energy from family, friends, and even from the social media universe. We both feel all the collective energy! Her heart may be weak, but she has a unique spirit and a strong will to overcome adversity! I couldn’t be prouder of her.

We both know the importance of going into the world safely. I love her smile in the photo above! Marla reads her body pretty well and usually knows when she just needs to stay home and rest. Her doctors won’t let her travel yet, but we hope this will change in 2022!

I purchased a new bike this year and it finally arrived after a six month wait. Getting out on the bike is needed therapy and helpful for destressing!

COVID times remained on the front burner always in flux… weaker then stronger, ever-changing week to week. And now…Omicron! I am thankful for our third Pfizer vaccine shot, but amazed and disappointed with the anti-vaccine, anti-maskers in our midst!

I tried to turn the new media knob down a few clicks this year to mixed success. I truly believe this is not a time to be pollyannish especially after the insurrection of January 6th. The state of the union and our precious democracy is under attack like never before in my lifetime! I am saddened to see how many still think the last presidential election was stolen even with no factual basis. Democracy requires a system to choose leaders fairly and safely. The use of max-gerrymandering and rule changes in many states makes voting more difficult for so many. Congressional maps are being redrawn in many states reducing districts for people of color…by white mapmakers!

Some politicians and school board members (notably in Texas and Virginia) call for banning or removal of books in school libraries and the classroom which they deem offensive to their personal worldview.  Many of the challenged books are about race or LGBTQ identities. We need to remember the lessons from “Fahrenheit 451”.

We all are navigating the best we can in this new and often confusing world. I am sad to see some so-called news outlets spewing alternative factual reporting often criticizing vaccine mandates and describing vaccination and mask wearing as a personal choice.

So many people live in a world of counterfactual thinking! We cannot keep our heads buried in the sand of complacency because…“Democracy dies in darkness!” Even in this current political mayhem I am hopeful for good people to come together and fight for the common good of…ALL people… no matter their beliefs… their ethnicity… or sexual orientation.

I’ll raise a glass and wish you all good health and a large dollop of happiness in the New Year! May we all have a great 2022!

Photos: Dick Gentry. Not to be used without permission.